I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
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