I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
