Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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