i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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