That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
