Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize
