i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I just want to make out with him forever
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
