Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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