Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
