That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
