you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
