u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
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I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
