In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Randomize
