An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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