With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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