how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
