Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
