You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
