guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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