If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
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