3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Randomize
