sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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