We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
