Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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