Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
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