I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
