also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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