Sry I called you an 8
YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Randomize
