I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
