do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize
