Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Randomize
