You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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