I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
