oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
