he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
Randomize
