Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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