I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Randomize
