i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
