i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
