He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
