YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
please come you make the beer taste better
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Randomize
