it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Randomize
