you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
