We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
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