i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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