So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Randomize
