I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Randomize
