I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
