spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Couch. On fire.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
