When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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