how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
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